Opium Dreams

In the beginning, we are all but one. Good is bad and bad is good. We are all one and the same. Panjia. This process is heavy on my body and soul. But I need to do it, and I only hope that my efforts will be accepted.  I have enough juice left for one journey. I need to make the most of it.  I light up my pipe. "This time will be a bit different," I say to myself with a tired grimace, "a bit grimmer". I lie down and look up. I take a dive.  Inhale I look deep into my memory. I feel my mind drifting.  I see myself on a horseback. My skin as soft as butter and my soul unburdened. I am a newborn. I extend my hand and touch the horse's mane. I can not see it but we are connected. I look up and see a man riding the horse. Young and powerful he is. He looks at me and I meet his eyes, as black as a moonless night. I guess we all have the same eyes where I come from. I let myself sucked into his eyes and feel the infinite night surround me until there's nothing but

Let the time come and go freely. It is but a construct of your soul to protect you, to remind you of your limits, what you can do, and what you shouldn't do. Give it its freedom and it shall give you yours. I thank you for indulging and hope this journey will be less arduous than its predecessors.  Inhale I look deep into my memory and I see myself. I see myself lying down a tree. It is nice to be able to enjoy the shade after a day's work. I have no worries. My world has ended and I am lying on top of its rubble. If I have survived this long, it only goes to show that my survival is inevitable. I fear nothing and no one. I think about nothing and no one. My mind is as present as it is absent. I think I have reached it. The state my master always spoke of. Panjia. I like myself at this moment. "I'm in good shape" I tell myself. Nothing can get to me.  It doesn't take me long to notice that I've fallen into my own trap. My hubris was lurking just below the